Unselfishness

 This week we talked about sexual intimacy and different ways to better have trust and love with your partner. A lot of times in a relationship for a woman to want to have sex with her husband she first needs to feel safe, warm, and close with her husband. For boys however they have to have sex with their wife in order for them to feel safe, warm, and close to their wife. At first glance this might see like it could cause some problems. In order for both the husband and wife to both feel that love, warmth, closeness, and safety, there needs to be complete selflessness in the relationship. In 1Corinthians 7:3 it says, "Let the ^ahusband render unto the ^bwife due ^cbenevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband." If you look into the word benevolence it means complete kindness, love, and gentleness. We are commanded by Heavenly Father to give kindness, love, and gentleness to our spouses. Especially in our intimacy with them. The reason for sex and intimacy is to 1. bring children into the world and create a family. 2. create the greatest form of love to our spouse. This is something that should not be taken for granted or lusted after. As you think of your spouse more than yourself in intimacy and in your relationship, you will grow closer together and be able to create a loving and safe environment for you and your family. Another part of a marriage relationship we focused on was the 4 main ways of an affair. First there is the physical act of having an affair with another person outside of your marriage. Then there is the fantasizing of pornography, thinking after others outside of your relationship, and creating situations in your mind that aren't in your marriage. Next there is the emotional stand point of not having or creating a safe environment and last financial situations of not sharing bank accounts or spending/keeping secret money. When one or all of these things are happening in a relationship there are going to be big issues of trust, love, and companionship. A few ways we talked about avoiding these things were: 1. Not spending time alone with the opposite sex. This opens up a lot of opportunities to develop feelings for another person. Even if those feelings are from a friend stand point, the effort put into that friend is taken away from your spouse leaving gaps in your marriage relationship. 2. Not talking badly or complaining about your spouse to others. When you talk badly about your spouse or complain about them it starts to make tears in your relationship and also opens you up to relationships as you relate and open up to those you share your personal relationship with. Now if there are ever any forms of abuse in your relationship then talking to someone and getting help would be needed but this is for more day to day annoyances or smaller arguments. 3. Share your entire bank information with your spouse. We are told to be one heart, one mind, and in this case one bank account. Both of the spouses in the relationship should have total viewing and access to the money and spending going on in the family. Doing these things will help you in your relationship to help better communication and trust as you build your home and family. Not everything will be perfect or even ideal. But as you put your spouse first and try everyday to be unselfish you will come closer together in trust, intimacy, love, and life in general.